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Issue 6, 02-15-10
Letting Go of Limiting Paradigms
When I was beginning 8th grade, my family moved to a new town where we would get to live next door to my grandparents. While that was very exciting, I quickly discovered that the students in my new school were light years ahead of me in math.
My wonderful Grandfather took it upon himself to help me with my math nearly every day after school. I loved spending time with him. He was self educated and could put the challenging concepts into simple terms, make math interesting, and even fun. And my Grandmother saw to the cookies and milk, which most certainly helped. The tutoring continued for quite some time, until my Grandfather died suddenly one beautiful spring day.
I was devastated on many levels, including the D I would ultimately earn in math that year. The bad math grades haunted me throughout high school. As I racked up bad math grades, I told myself that I surely must not be college material. And so I found a job soon after high school graduation and began working.
Shortly after turning 23, I began working for a company that reimbursed college tuition 100%. Still firmly believing that I was not college material, I thought I might just take one or two evening courses to see what it was like. I knew darned well I didn't belong in college, but something bigger than fear of math pulled me into enrolling in a class called Art Appreciation. Surely, there were no numbers in such a class. I found that while I really had to work hard, I enjoyed that class, and even surprised myself by earning an A. With that success under my belt, I decided to take another class, and another, and another, all the while avoiding anything remotely related to math. This avoidance strategy worked for years, since I was on the slow track, taking one or two classes a semester due to my day job.
My confidence increased a tad with each A, until I began to think that I may just be college material after all. For over a decade, I continued to work and attend night school, enjoying my studies, and, yes, continuing to earn A's. I did eventually face my fear of math. I just kept taking classes until it all turned into a degree and then on to grad school.
At some point in my educational adventures, I was introduced to the notion of a paradigm. A paradigm is an assumption or way of thinking about yourself, others, or a circumstance. A perfect example of a universal paradigm that once existed: The World is Flat! Until that paradigm was challenged, it was the prevailing assumption, and therefore limited exploration.
In our work as business and personal coaches, we notice that one of the most powerful tools for personal transformation is a paradigm shift. To make a paradigm shift, it is important to identify assumptions or beliefs that are limiting you and then challenging them. If you discover they are not true, consider generating a more empowering paradigm.
Old Paradigm: I am not college material. New Paradigm: I just may be college material.
Limiting beliefs, if not challenged, limit exploration and box us in. Once challenged, the way is clear for personal and professional growth. And, it then becomes possible for each year to be better than the one before.
Your Coaching Challenge for the week, should you choose to accept it:
Take a few minutes to identify ways you may be limiting yourself. Challenge yourself to see if you may be operating under an old or incorrect assumption. How might you shift that assumption or paradigm so that it energizes you rather than limits you? If life is a self-fulfilling prophecy, how might a new paradigm alter your future?
We'll see you on-line next Monday! Wishing you Your Best Week Yet!
Cheers! Coach Jeanne
The Quality Coach!®, Celebrating over 20 Years of Coaching Great Leaders & Teams.
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